Let me introduce you to two men who live half way across the country from one another and couldn’t be both more different and more the same than any two men you can find anywhere.
They’ve only met once in real life (when this photo was taken). But have so much in common and their relationship should be a model that the rest of the country can take a lesson from in my opinion.
On the right of the photo is my husband Steve (aka Alex P. Keaton, young Republican) and on the left, my friend Nicole’s husband, Paul (aka Wavy Gravy, THE HIPPIE).
Nic and I have been friends for almost a decade (I suck at math and remembering important dates). We met through an online forum for scrapbookers. She is smart, talented, snarky and funny so of course I fell in love almost immediately. She always shared funny stories (and photos!) of stuff she and Paul would do together and I always knew they had a great relationship and admired them for it.
Steve and Paul met in person in 2010 when we were in San Diego for a family vacation. We only met for lunch and drinks outside the San Diego Wild Animal Park because of our schedules didn’t allow for more. But Paul’s outgoing personality made a lasting impression. Steve, Paul and Nic became Facebook official. Paul isn’t shy about sharing his (political) opinions online and often they differ from Steve’s but it was all good.
The key here is that they both hold strong to their opinions but maintain a respect for the other side and will listen and acknowledge the other side’s right to have that opinion even if they disagree. It helps that Steve isn’t a blind, bigoted, tea-bagging right winger, he just believes in the true, original, core values of the Republican party and is holding on to the dream that someday they will get back to that again. He believes in personal responsibility and fiscal conservatism but he also believes in gay rights, women’s rights, environmental responsibility, among other “liberal” issues. Paul also doesn’t fit all of the stereotypes that the right-wing media likes to paint of the other side either. One way to look at it is, Paul is a “responsible liberal” and Steve is a “conservative with a heart of gold”. Either way, they prove that one can not paint any group with a broad brush and make any assumptions.
The point here isn’t to focus on their differences but on how they are alike. If I say so myself, above all else, they love their wives and families. Both have put up with their wife’s crazy notions and went along and enjoyed (?) the ride. They’ve accepted our friends and welcomed them into their lives and recognized how important these friendships are for us. They’ve been there when its all fallen apart and held our hands and our hearts and nurtured us through heartbreak and pain. They’ve laughed with us (and at us!) and helped us find the funny in situations that maybe weren’t so much at the time.
Just recently they both joined us on the wild and crazy adventure that was GISHWHES 2012 and agreed to be dressed up in silly costumes and make public fools of themselves all in the name of being random and kind. I like to believe that America and the rest of the world can eventually get to the point Steve & Paul are at, very divergent opinions and viewpoints but still friends. Above all else, kindness and respect, and most importantly, love.
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